Day #24: What makes you happy?
Spending time with my family. My family makes me happy like nothing else, especially my mom and brothers. I adore my nieces and nephews. I have always been close to my family. I grew up playing board games with them, playing pretend, playing video games, reading with them, arguing with and making up with them, making craft with them, so on and so forth. My family didn’t have a lot of money, but we had each other and we have always been there for each other.
I did my first grocery shopping trip in…I don’t even know how long. Not shopping for binge/purge food, but shopping for a menu, shopping for meals and snacks.
I hated it. I panicked. I cried. I loathed that food in my basket.
But I did it.
The feeling of hating food, just hating food in general, has lingered. Right now, I don’t want to make breakfast. I don’t want to pack food to take for the weekend. I don’t want to follow my meal plan. But I DO want to recovery, and I know that I can’t do that without trusting my dietician and without following the meal plan. So I’m going to try to do all of those things.
I can’t believe I have all this food in the house. Last night I just wanted to binge and purge on all of it. Yet, I didn’t.
And now I shall get ready for the day, and I will eat.