Tag Archives: paranoia



I had 354 calories in one meal. It’ll be my only meal today so that I can drink tonight. However, i had more calories in this meal than I ate all day yesterday and that freaks me out 

It’s amazing how quickly my mind goes back into freakout mode when I get back into restricting. I think I’ll go purge, I feel sick and so full. I might eliminate my 800 days and tonight. This is just too much. 


Fucking diet soda!


Did you know a (12 ounce) can of diet soda has 4 calories?? That may not seem like a big deal to some people, but when every calorie for your day is allotted and accounted for, it’s a huge deal. When you only consume 200 calories in a day, that a HUGE deal. It also makes me suspicious of anything labeled 0 calories. Where else am I getting ninja calories from?? 

Tomorrow I had planned to have some vodka with diet soda as part of my allotted 800 calories. Now I know I need to allow for the calories in the soda too. I’m glad I know ahead of time. 

I will probably be suspicious of all calorie counts on all labels from now on. Thanks, soda companies and the government, for feeding into my paranoia. 


When paranoia gets the better of me


Today, the reality of the fact that starches turn to sugar in the body hit me and I decided to stop eating them.