Tag Archives: library

LoveMe Challenge, Day 18



Day #18: Something that feeds your brain.

Reading. I’m lucky enough to have been born to two avid readers who also loved to read to their children. I practically grew up in libraries. I adore reading and when the apathy and listlessness of my bipolar depression hasn’t taken over to where I can’t get myself to do anything, I read all the time, anything I can get my hands on, both fiction and non-fiction. Right now I’m reading Loving Our Kids on Purpose, The Way They Learn, The Picture of Dorian Gray, and The Secret Garden. (The last two are re-reads.)


The Worst Walk


Yesterday I went to the library! I’d never been to this library before. I didn’t even know it existed until late Friday night. They’re only open until 5pm on Saturdays and I normally get up between 1-3pm, so that doesn’t leave a lot of time to walk to the library and back, so I set my alarm for an “early” noon.

Yesterday afternoon, I got up, dawdled a little on my 3DS and phone, took a shower, and left.

I had already planned on yesterday being a fasting day before I knew about the library, and I didn’t alter that plan when I decided to go to the library. I also didn’t have any water before I left, and ended up walking during the hottest part of the day. Yeah, I’m brilliant.

The walk there didn’t actually phase me. I had planned to look around, maybe sit and read for a little bit, and then walk home. However, come to find out, this library was tiny. On top of that, it was FULL. With no place to sit down and feeling sort of out of place, I grabbed 2 books randomly from their very small fantasy collection, and the only Star Wars novel I could find.

I checked out, grabbed a drink from the water fountain, and left.

I only made it about a third of the way home (the walk is about an hour) before I was having difficulty breathing and was feeling like I was going to pass out. I found a shaded hill and sat down for a couple minutes.

For the rest of the walk, I felt extremely weak and dizzy, constantly on the brink of passing out. However, I don’t have phone service anymore, so I couldn’t even call anyone. I had to sit down again when I was about 15 minutes from home. I almost fell into the street just trying to sit.

Getting up that second time, I got tangled in my ankle-length dress trying to stand. As soon as I was upright, I had to lean against that wall next to the sidewalk so as not to fall. That last leg was brutal. I am sure I looked drunk, I was swaying and just struggling to stay upright.

Finally, I reached my street. Just one more hill (luckily down hill) and I was home.

As I crossed the street to my block, a police office pulled up to the intersection. I was seriously tempted to ask him to drive me the half block to my house.

Once inside, I kicked off my shoes and collapsed on my dad’s bed (it’s closer than mine, and underneath the air conditioning unit) and lay there for about 20 minutes until I could see properly again.

On the plus side, my legs were fine. Despite the fact that I haven’t taken a 2 hour walk in quite some time, all my biking has paid off. However, my body really does not appreciate the not eating, not drinking water, etc.

Too bad. It’d better get used to it. I’m determined to go back to restricting. I’m sick and tired of bulimia.