My ex wouldn’t let me cut my hair. My hair was pretty long. The last few days, I’ve been thinking about cutting it. Partly as a “screw you” to my ex and partly because I wanted a change and I was feeling like if I didn’t cut my hair, I might do something stupid like drop out of school or fly to another state to live (with no job and no plan) so I cut my hair. I cut about a foot off. I really like it. And I feel so light now.
Despite everything that’s going on with recovery and transitioning to a lower level of care and having a slip yesterday and just all of the struggle, I’ve been really happy lately. It’s really nice to be happy for a change.
I’m discharging on Tuesday. I start EIOP Wednesday.
I’m conflicted. Excited, scared, hopeful, anxious.
I have blue dye in my hair. A touch up job. I have a snack and dinner pass tomorrow. I’m going to comicon tomorrow afternoon/evening and I want my hair to look its best.
I am nervous about going. I feel like the stereotypical fat geek girl. It doesn’t help that I’m going with my brother and his tall, thin, gorgeous girlfriend. However, I’ve been wanting to go for years and every year something comes up. I’m taking this opportunity.
Other than Comicon, I’ve got a ton of discharge paperwork to do this weekend. I had my last family session today. We went over my wellness plan. The wellness plan goes over things like how I plan to eat well, keep balance in my life, sleep appropriately, exercise in a healthful way, my triggers, signs of relapse, how my support system can help me, and so forth. It’s extensive. (Like 10 typed pages?)
I met with my dietician and went over my discharge meal plan. I had to make a week’s meal plan with 21 different meals and 21 snacks (3 meals and 3 snacks a day) and it had to be reviewed and approved by my dietician.
I also met with my psychiatrist and he changed my anxiety med. Hopefully this one works better for me. My doctor also prescribed a new medication to prevent migraines.
So much change is happening.