Grief

The 3 year anniversary of my sister’s death is on Tuesday.

Three years and I still don’t know how to get past it.

I still can’t think of her without falling apart. I still don’t know how to deal with the pain. I still hate this time of year. The anniversary of her death, Thanksgiving, Christmas, her birthday.

I decided to go online and look for a grief workbook.

I couldn’t even do that without crying.

I feel so stuck. And broken.

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Accomplishment!

It’s assembled!

I didn’t do it. I convinced my daddy to.

I still haven’t eaten today. I did get some water down. I then used my bike until my legs turned to jello (didn’t take nearly as long as I’d hoped), took some laxatives, and collapsed in bed.

That’s where I am now. I shall spend the rest of the night watching Netflix, probably The Wonder Years, until I get sleepy.

Have a good night!