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I started intensive outpatient yesterday. This means doing 2 meals at home. However, I’m on disability and hardly get enough money to cover bills, let alone money to buy food. In shame, I told my dietitian this. She then took me to a food bank. It was an overwhelming experience. It was filled with fear foods, which were handed to me whether I wanted them or not. On top of that, while waiting for my turn to go through the line, the man at my table kept talking about being too fat and how he wouldn’t eat the bread because he didn’t want to gain more weight and so forth.

I now have food to last a while, minus protein, though I do have a whole frozen chicken in my freezer. I feel like an awful person for taking all this free food that I don’t want in the first place. I don’t want to eat it and I don’t want it in my house. How awful am I that I took food from someone who wanted it when I don’t even want this food??

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2 responses »

  1. Just put it away, don’t look at it and don’t even go into your kitchen unless you can think of a specific set of items you think you can manage. That’s a lot of food to look at in whole, but it’s meant to last a while. Break it down. Don’t think about it until you have to. 😦 I understand your feelings though…. keep fighting.

    Liked by 2 people

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