But this time, it was due to the laxatives. Racing heart, shaking limbs, cramps, nausea, frequent trips to the bathroom. I hadn’t forgotten about these, but I had forgotten how much I disliked the feeling. Yet, I don’t want to stop taking the laxatives. I feel dizzy, but I feel clean. I am dehydrated, but I am empty. I feel powerful again. High on life. I have missed this. I feel weak and it proves that I am strong.
Sep9
a2eternity 
Reblogged this on perfectlyfadeddelusions.
LikeLike
and you were doing so well. š¦ xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
Being weak does not prove you are strong. Being strong proves you are strong. Stop taking the laxatives. You are an actually strong, beautiful, intelligent woman, and you know that this high is not worth the damage it wreaks. Email me if you want additional support: laurietopin@gmail.com
LikeLiked by 2 people
:[
LikeLike
Your sad face makes me sad
LikeLike
Just thinking of the pain and the place you were at a few days ago. Hope you are ok. I don’t want you to end up in the hospital again. Those are not fun!!
LikeLike
I almost want to end up back in the hospital again because that means I will have accomplished something.
LikeLike
Hugs
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you
LikeLiked by 1 person
There are many bumps on the road to wellness. I understand this well. You really are strong and one day, your strength will look different than it does now. Be well.
LikeLiked by 2 people
What other things give you that sense of power, of control? Sometimes finding different and safer ways to accomplish the desired mental state can help you redirect urges that you don’t necessarily want to fight.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nothing that I know of
LikeLike
Just keep looking…it is worth it…You are Being Heard!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am with you in love in spirit and in soul. sparkle thoughts my darlin
LikeLiked by 1 person
You can beat this.
LikeLiked by 1 person