Day One of Plan “Be Better”

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Day one of my plan to be better is going well. It’s 4pm and I haven’t eaten. I have, however, worked out. It was hard. I am in so much fibromyalgia pain, my whole body hurts. I got hardly any sleep last night because of it. Working out through it took all my determination. And yet, I did it!

I also got good news. I have insurance again! I was able to pick up the 3 prescriptions I haven’t had, including my fibromyalgia medication. While it doesn’t provide immediate relief, I am so grateful to have it again.

I’m worried about the logistics of not eating until Sunday. I know that I can do it, physically, but I also know my mom is bound to notice. Earlier today, I was told that if I’m not going back to treatment, I need to tell my parents how they can help me with recovery. I have nothing for them, since I’m not trying to recover. I don’t really want to have that conversation, though. I’m afraid that now that my parents have been involved in my treatment, and have forced me into treatment before, they will give me some kind of ultimatum if they realize I’m not eating. I really need to move out on my own so I can fully make my own decisions.

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11 responses »

  1. Can I ask why you aren’t eating? I always found that restricting like that set me up for days of rebellion and much more disordered behaviour afterwards… Please be careful. Our bodies need food; make sure you are honouring yours! Sending love xxx

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