I told my dietician today that I think my meal plan is too high.
She asked what made me think that. I said it just feels like too much food.
She asked what I perceive my weight to be doing since admitting. I said it’s gone up a lot.
She said it’s actually gone down.
I felt like I’d been punched in the stomach. This isn’t bad news, but it felt like a lie. Or surely their scale is broken?
There’s a bizarre feeling when what you knew to be true turns out to be false.
If only this made eating meals and snacks easier.
a2eternity 
It sounds right to me. If you up your calories, your body stops assuming that it is starving and it lets go of some. It happens to me, too.
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Trust the process! Your body is doing what it needs to do! It’s not easy but hang on in there, it will be worth it.
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You have to remember how warped Anorexia is making your thoughts. The lower your weight and the less you eat the harder it is to think clearly. Keep fighting!
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Thank you
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Something that kind of sorta works for me is knowing that when I binge that there is no way I could be purging ALL of the food, I’m good but that good. And then I add mentally add up in my head what even a bit of the caloric content would be and realize I could have just ate “normally” and consumed less. So in other words it’s so much easier to just eat and be human and let go…it gets easier. And as soon as you start to restrict the bingeing intrudes and then before you know it you’re trapped in that vicious cycle you just worked so hard to get of. Hope this wasn’t triggering and that it makes sense LoL because it’s meant to be caring and helpful. And I also agree that the more your body knows it will get that the more efficient your metabolism will be. So it’s all win/win once your mind grasps onto to it.
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