I don’t love you, Friday

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So, I’m a little bit sunburnt. My face hurts.

Today has been long. I get so freaked out on Fridays, review days. I binged and purged for hours. HOURS.

And naturally, the center called while I was purging to let me know I have been approved for one more week.

Friday is the hardest day of the week for me. I have dozens of friends on Facebook posting about how excited they are for Friday and I’m sitting here just waiting for it to end. I think I’m going to start skipping Fridays.

Sometimes I feel like I’m suffocating from how much I hate myself. I literally can’t breathe. The only ways I know to get out of it is to either self-harm or binge and purge.

Tomorrow I’m going to be out all day with A. I need to pack a lunch and remember my sunscreen, and part my hair differently because my scalp is already falling off.

I feel like I’m just rambling, so I’m going to go and try not to binge and purge any more tonight.

9 responses »

  1. Sorry to hear… It was my grandads funeral today and I know that hate Friday feeling . .. . I jogged on spot mindlessly for 6 hours. Not slept for three days.
    Why do we do this to ourselves.
    Take care I am thinking about you.
    Ps jealous of sunburn it is always seems to be cold and wet where I am .

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  2. Centres have the best timing, right? They knocked on my door once for an apartment check when I was purging. That was unpleasant…
    I’m glad you were approved for another week! Fridays suck, but skipping treatment on Fridays would only give you more time during which you could justify binging and purging or self-harming. Lean into the support a little extra on Fridays. šŸ™‚
    Hugs!

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  3. Why do people always phone in the middle of a good puking session? Um…hello? I’m vomiting! Stay strong hun. This too shall pass. Keep me updated over the weekend. I will try to get to the phone in between my ridiculous guest-judging schedule xx

    Liked by 1 person

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